Happy Birthday, Texas! | The Daytripper Birthdays are a time to celebrate, reflect on the year, and make future wishes for the year to come. Hissy fit. I thought it was a joke. TOP 25 BIRTHDAY QUOTES (of 1000) | A-Z Quotes Were still figuring out how to spell tolerance. I was going to get you a present, but I figured my presence was enough of a gift. (For people without US cell phone plans). -Larry L. King, What do the Texans say? Hes all hat and no cattle. "May you be gifted with life's biggest joys and never-ending bliss. Hes overdrawn at the memory bank. -Mike Blakely, Most Americans can cover their home state in less than a week. Congratulations, and may life keeps smiling at you as it has been up to now. 500 matching entries found. Trust us, it's worse than dogs. hapy birthday greetings typography with ornament iilustration. Shes frying size.Hes knee-high to a grasshopper.Hed have to stand up to look a rattler in the eye.About as big as the little end of nothing.Half as big as a minute.No bigger than moles on a chigger.Scrawny as Ace Reid cattle.Nothing between the horns and hooves but hide.Thin as a bars ear.Thin as a gnats whisker.Thin as store-bought thread.Thin as Depression soup.Thin as a fiddle string.Thin as a rake and twice as sexy.Flat as a fritter.Scarce-hipped.So skinny she has to stand twice to make a shadow.So skinny you could give her a Big Red and use her as a thermometer.So skinny she shades herself under the clothesline. Copyright 2021-2023 - Roaming the USA -- All rights reserved | Made with love in the , 71 Best Texas Sayings and Quotes for Proud Texans. So crooked that if he swallowed a nail, hed spit up a corkscrew. I always like to pick mine up ahead of time. )Calling for Earl. What to make of a state that is so focused on itself? After all, you yourself are a gift to earth, so you deserve the best. Port Arthur people thought I was a beatnik, though they'd never seen one and neither had I. I'm from Texas originally, and I've always wanted to be in a horror movie, so I've gotten both of my wishes with this project. If you do use one, Id love if you linked or tagged me so I can enjoy your work! Welcome to the Return of Glam at the Best New Hotels in Texas, A Head Above: How Barbacoa Paved the Way for Barbecue, Sex, Threats, and Late-Night Phone Calls: The Allegations From Inside Jolanda Joness Legislative Office, Hellhounds on His Trail: Mack McCormicks Long, Tortured Quest to Find the Real Robert Johnson. 1. The 105 Funny get well wishes for friends, mother, father, son and daughter; 35+ Feel Better Soon Quotes; 65+ Get . It would be an honor to get dismembered by a chainsaw. Discover Texan cities, small towns, and outdoor attractions. Don't mess with Texas. Who are these people, these Texans? David Courtney, a.k.a. Above all, Texas is a nation in every sense of the word. The 80 Cute quotes for her; The 60 Best Get Well Soon Quotes For Him or Her. Statistics show that the people who have the most live the longest." Check out these belated birthday wishes if you're looking to make it up to your friend whose. Pigs get fat; hogs get slaughtered.A worm is the only animal that cant fall down.Never sign nothing by neon.Just because a chicken has wings dont mean it can fly.Keep your saddle oiled and your gun greased.You cant get lard unless you boil the hog.If you cut your own firewood, itll warm you twice.Theres more than one way to break a dog from sucking eggs.Give me the bacon without the sizzle.Dont hang your wash on someone elses line.Do Gods will, whatever the hell it may be.Lick that calf again? Texans think big. Phil Gramm, Texas women are like snowflakes. )Dont get all het up about it.Theres a big difference between the ox and the whiffletree.Theres no tree but bears some fruit.Skin your own buffalo.You better throw a sop to the dogs.Dont squat on your spurs.Any mules tail can catch cockleburs.A drought usually ends with a flood.If you lie down with dogs, you get up with fleas.A lean dog runs fast.The apple doesnt fall far from the tree. Happy Birthday, Texas: How well do you know the state? Waco: American Apocalypse Doesnt Even Try. for that talkative friend. 2. Best Funny & Humorous Happy Birthday Wishes Texas girlsare tough as nails and you'd be hard pressed to ever shake them with adversity. They work to live there. Robert Rodriguez (this is one of our favorite Austin quotes! Hes such a liar hed beat you senseless and tell God you fell off a horse.He was born sorry.Hes so low hed steal the widows ax.Hed steal his mamas egg money.Hed steal the flowers off his grandmas grave.Hed steal the nickels off a dead mans eyes.No-account fellow.Bitter as gall.Tough as nickel steak.Tough as stewed skunk.Tough as whang.Mean as a mama wasp.Friendly as a bramble bush.She makes a hornet look cuddly.A she-bear in satin.Rough as a cob.He looks like a sheep-killing dog.He lies like a tombstone.He wouldnt scratch his own mamas fleas.Hes got horns holding up his halo.Were not on borrowing terms.Youre so low you have to look up to see hell.Hes so low you couldnt put a rug under him.He jumped on me with all four feet.A real revolving son of a bitch. Looking for beautiful quotes about Texas? 80+ Inspirational Birthday Quotes : Motivate and Celebrate )He learned to whisper in a sawmill. "I choose Nashville.". Dream big and make them true, so that one-day people get inspired by your sheer guts. These funny birthday quotes will put a smile on your face. Austin, Texas is the subject of many popular quotes, sayings, and slogans! Birthdays Sayings and Birthdays Quotes | Wise Sayings For all the smiles you put on my face and the people around. And what could possibly be a better way to talk about this state than discussing its funny Texas sayings, quotes, expressions, and jokes? "You May All Go to Hell and I Will Go to Texas" Davy Crockett This quote truly epitomizes the spirit of Texas. I will never be able to forget the support that you have given me. In three days, no one could stand him. Joseph Heller, I felt a little guilty about jangling the poor buggers brains with that evil fantasy. Texas is an obsession. Celebrate one more turn around the sun with the collection of quotes about birthdays below. I know that you'll attain more this year dear. Count not the years, but the life you live. Texas is a blend of valor and swagger. Carl Sandburg, Texas history is as varied, tempestuous, and vast as the state itself. If your favorite 60-year-old has a good sense of humor, teasing them a little (in good fun) is okay. - Funny Birthday wishes. George Meredith. Download high quality Texas clip art graphics. 101 Best Birthday Quotes and Messages - Petal Republic Your advancement in years is a progression into the plans and purpose of God for you. It is time to sing and dance, and it is time for birthday bumps! The Texanist: Is It Okay For Non-Texans to Say Howdy? The 60 Best Happy Birthday To Sister Quotes from Heart; Happy Birthday To Cousin; Love Quotes for Him; The 60 Romantic Cute Love Quotes For Her from Heart. A Camerasince Texas is super photogenic. Here's hoping you hear your husband say, "I have a present for youand it's jewelry!" I'm thinking of you today. The Top 50 Texas BBQ Joints: 2021 Edition. (Your flys down. When the passions have relaxed their hold, you may have escaped, not from one master but from many." Pope John XXIII: "Men are like wine. That is truer than true! The Lone Star State has inspired some truly beautiful travel quotes. Miranda Lambert 0 Copy In Texas we practically come out of the womb in jeans. But did you know that there are many other famous quotes about Texas and sayings that make perfect captions for social media posts or Instagram stories? In three days no one could stand him. I'd be part of Texas folklore. We also want to be the first people to greet you a Happy Birthday! Anybody who wanders around the world saying, Hell yes, Im from Texas, deserves whatever happens to him. Hunter S. Thompson, The definition of insanity in Texas is so insane that its impossible to be insane in Texas. Malcolm McDowell. They took a great failure and turned it into a tourist destination that makes them millions. -Larry McMurtry, This is Texas. Funny Birthday Quotes: 125 Funny Birthday Sayings for 2023 60 Funny Birthday Quotes Perfect for Cards - Reader's Digest Shes itching for something she wont scratch for. for dreaming for something too big! - By The Beatles. Congratulations on surviving another year on this planet. Looking for Best Road Trip Ideas in Texas. Todays Texas is exhilarating, exasperating, violent, charming, horrible, delightful, alive. Edna Ferber, There is a growing feeling that perhaps Texas is really another country, a place where the skies, the disasters, the diamonds, the politicians, the women, the fortunes, the football players are all bigger than anywhere else. Pete Hamill, Read next: Incredible Weekend Getaways in Texas, There is a special mystique to Texas. - Jim Gaffigan. Looks like hell with everyone out to lunch.Out where the buses dont run. Big Tex welcomed 3,959,058 visitors to Fair Park during the exposition, the largest attendance ever for an American state fair and the longest fair in American history. See more ideas about birthday greetings, birthday, greetings. Being from Texas, I would say I favor a pair of jeans you can wear some boots with. -Jensen Ackles, In Texas, we practically come out of the womb in jeans. -Kelly Clarkson, Texans aint Texans if they arent willing to boast about the state they call home. ~Anon, Texans ignored better, long ago forgot the useless word good. Everything in Texas is best. ~Edward Smith, You can take the girl out of Texas but not Texas out of the girl. 7. Find Texas road trip ideas and itineraries. Count your age by friends, not years. Its especially important to get travel insurance if youll be hanging out in cities like Dallas or San Antonio where tourists can easily become the targets of pickpockets. 150 Birthday Quotes and Sayings | Keep Inspiring Me -Texas Department of Transportation. 100+ Happy 70th Birthday Quotes & Wishes of 2022 Wishing you a cheerful 60th birthday. Happy Birthday, my sugar lumps! And in the end, the love you take is equal to the love you make. All over the world, traveling Texans tend to identify as Texan rather than American, because, well, we get treated like celebrities when we do. Elizabeth Abrahamsen. He broke his arm patting himself on the back.He thinks the sun comes up just to hear him crow.Id like to buy him for what hes worth and sell him for what he thinks hell bring.Shes so spoiled salt couldnt save her.Shes so spoiled she expects spoon-feeding. Quick Facts FULL NAME: Barbara Jordan BORN: February 21, 1936 DIED: January 17, 1996 HOMETOWN: Houston, Texas ASTROLOGICAL SIGN: Pisces Early Life A groundbreaking African American politician,. Make your friends and family chuckle with these sayings, or make them laugh out loud with funny 60th birthday quotes.Witty quotes can also make great slogans for 60th . 6. "Pleas'd to look forward, pleas'd to look behind, and count each birthday with a grateful mind." - Alexander Pope. Here go some of our favorite Texas sayings. 118 Famous Texas Sayings and Phrases Along With Their Meanings 1. Its better than a poke in the eye with a sharp stick.Thats close enough for government work.Might as well. On my birthday, I wished for a friend like you. You will also find plenty of Texas sayings about being from here or living here. Texas is a cult. Lindsay Mcelwee, I Like The Image Texas Brings To Mindthat Of Bigness, Of Strength, Of Goodness. Ninfa Laurenzo, The enemy never sees the backs of my Texans! General Robert E. Lee, CSA, Texas history is a varied, tempestuous, and vast as the state itself. Every year on your bday, you get a chance to start new. (Snored. Happy 60th Birthday. Courtney Bond is an executive editor of Texas Monthlys Food & Drink and BBQ sections. Want to Buy a West Texas Ghost Town? In three days no one could stand him. Joseph Heller, If I owned Texas and Hell, I would rent out Texas and live in Hell General Philip Henry Sheridan, The definition of insanity in Texas is so insane that its impossible to be insane in Texas. Malcolm McDowell. Todays Texas is exhilarating, exasperating, violent, charming, horrible, delightful, alive. Edna Ferber, author, For all its enormous range of space, climate, and physical appearance, and for all the internal squabbles, contentions, and strivings, Texas has a tight cohesiveness perhaps stronger than any other section of America. Its our favorite Texas saying, yall. It starts at 5:30 p.m. on Friday night and events are scheduled until 11 p.m. Saturday night. -Willie Nelson, There is a growing feeling that perhaps Texas is really another country, a place where the skies, the disasters, the diamonds, the politicians, the women, the fortunes, the football players, and the murders are all bigger than anywhere else. Confused as a goat on AstroTurf.My tongue got caught in my eyeteeth and I couldnt see what I was saying.I can explain it to you, but I cant understand it for you.He ran em around the barn.Cattywampus to Miss Joness. 257 points. Wayne Chirisa. If that aint a fact, Gods a possum.You can take that to the bank.You can hang your hat on it.You can bet the farm on it.Hes so honest you could shoot craps with him over the phone.If I say a hen dips snuff, you can look under her wing for the can. He blames everything on the weather or his raising.He got caught in his own loop.He came close to the dollar knife. As welcome as an egg-sucking dog unwelcome. A version of this article appears in our 2019. I got treated very badly in Texas. Hell eat anything that dont eat him first. Hey'It's your 60th birthday!' when youre very mad. Texas is an obsession. Texas is Texas. William Blakely, People dont live in Austin to work. 30 Birthday Quotes To Celebrate Your Friends and Loved Ones Drop them in the comments below! We're coming for you! 130 Happy Birthday To Me Quotes, Wishes, Sayings & Messages I wish you a speedy recovery from all that you lost in earlier years. Texas is a cult. -Travels with Charley, If I owned Texas and Hell, I would rent out Texas and live in Hell. 50 Fabulous Things to Do in Washington State: Bucket List & Beyond! 71 Best Texas Sayings and Quotes for Proud Texans "I think Texans have more fun than the rest of the world." - Tommy Tune. Texas Sayings - Texas Monthly May 5 2011 at 4 43 am the best thing to come out of oklahoma is 35 south. What: Navasota is throwing a Texas-sized two-day birthday party. Hes on a first-name basis with the bottom of the deck.So crooked that if he swallowed a nail hed spit up a corkscrew.So crooked you cant tell from his tracks if hes coming or going.He knows more ways to take your money than a roomful of lawyers.Crooked as a dogs hind leg.Crooked as the Brazos.Slicker than a slop jar.More twists than a pretzel factory.Crooked as a barrel of fish hooks.So crooked he has to unscrew his britches at night.Shes more slippery than a pocketful of pudding.Hes slicker than a boiled onion.I wouldnt trust him any farther than I can throw him. Two tips on your birthday: 1) Forget the past, you can't change it. May your smile get brighter with each passing year. If I live to see your grandchildren, I'm going to tell them all the Birthday pranks we played on you every year. John Lennon 2. So dry the catfish are carrying canteens. HAPPY BIRTHDAY. Many Baby Boomers acknowledge their 50 th . Don't die a copy." John Mason "You are. Check out my Balkan Travel Blog + Oklahoma Travel Blog, 50 Stunning Hawaii Quotes & Hawaii Instagram Caption Inspiration, 101 Quotes about Los Angeles & LA Quotes that Make Perfect LA Instagram Captions, 50 Inspirational Kansas Quotes for Kansas Instagram Captions & Statuses, 101 Gorgeous Quotes About California & Fabulous California Instagram Captions, 250 Inspirational Travel Quotes & Travel Instagram Captions, 101 Fabulous Quotes about New York & New York Instagram Captions, 30 Beautiful Chicago Quotes & Chicago Instagram Caption Inspiration, 13 Inspirational Colorado Quotes & Colorado Instagram Inspiration, The Best Texas Quotes & Texas Instagram Captions. Texas yesterday is unbelievable, but no more incredible than Texas today. I'm so glad you never act your agelet's have some fun tonight! He told them that for the past 50 years he had sprinkled a little gunpowder on his cereal each morning. 21 Texas birthday greetings ideas | birthday greetings, birthday, greetings Texas is Texas. Here are some of our favorite Texas quotes, Texas Instagram captions, and Lone Star sayings to make you fall deeper in love with Texas! He could talk the legs off a chair.He could talk the gate off its hinges.He could talk the hide off a cow.He could talk the ears off a mule.He shoots off his mouth so much he must eat bullets for breakfast.Hes got a ten-gallon mouth.She speaks ten words a second, with gusts to fifty.Her tongue is plumb tuckered.Shes got tongue enough for ten rows of teeth.She beats her own gums to death.He blew in on his own wind.Hes a live dictionary.Hes a chin musician.She has a bell clapper instead of a tongue.He was vaccinated with a Victrola needle. Cake-check, candles-check, party caps-check, the birthday person-CHECK! May your birthday be as sweet as you are. Nows Your Chance. Never ask a barber if he thinks you need a haircut. happy birthday wishes little bunny svg png eps cut files typography. Comedian Jim Gaffigan's funny birthday quote is the ideal way to wish a loved one a happy birthday. Above all, Texas is a nation in every sense of the word. John Steinbeck, If a mans from Texas, hell tell you. History Fangirl is a participant in the Amazon Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for us to earn fees by linking to Amazon.com and affiliated sites. They get inspired by them. hes cheap. 3. Texas Birthday Quotes, Quotations & Sayings 2022 No place like Texas, my home, sweet home. Willie Nelson, And finally, the last and the best Texas quote yet. In Texas, if you concentrate and work at it steadily, you can traverse your territory by about age thirty-seven. I felt a little guilty about jangling the poor buggers brains with that evil fantasy. Everyone stood around singing 'Happy Bday.'. She occasionally writes about travel, too. Tight as Dicks hatband.Tight as a tick.Tight as a clothesline.Tight as a fiddle string.Tight as wallpaper.Tight as a wet boot.Tight enough to raise a blister.So tight he squeaks when he walks.Hell squeeze a nickel till the buffalo screams.She has short arms and deep pockets. Best Birthday Quotes with Sincere Wishes for Your Loved One Read these posts. It is a celebration of someone that is loved and greatly admired. "Country roads take me home to the place I belong.". You may remember fondly. "Put candles in a cake, it's a birthday cake. Home Texas 71 Best Texas Sayings and Quotes for Proud Texans. 2) Forget the present, I didn't get you one. "For all the advances in medicine, there is still no cure for the common birthday." John Glenn "A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman's birthday, but never remembers her age." Robert Frost "When a man has a birthday, he takes a day off. Hot will cool if greedy will let it.Take a tater and wait.Dont get your panties in a wad.Wash off your war paint. To me old age is 15 years older than I am. knee walking drunk to tell your friends about that epic night of partying. We moved to Texas and we loved it so much that we started this site! May your birthday be as beautiful as your soul is lovely. Related PostsThe 7 Regions of TexasThings to Know before you go to Texas70+ Interesting and Fun Facts about Texas. Happy birthday, friend! -James Michener. -Robert Kiyosaki, I was always proud of being from Texas and, you know, maybe that was part of fearlessness. -Katherine Dunn, Only Texas could turn defeat into a legendand a song, and a tourist attraction, and a major motion picture. All cut up like a boardinghouse pit.Grinning like a mule eating cockleburs.Nervous as a pregnant jenny.Nervous as a fly in the glue pot.Nervous as a woodshed waiter.Shes chewing her bit. The Ultimate Texas Brand Bracket Is Down to Its Elite Eight, Ford or Chevy? State historic sites include the Casa Navarro in San Antonio, Texas. Subscription: Inactive; Credits: 0; View Cart; Help; 900+ Texas Clip Art | Royalty Free. The Ultimate History Travel Blog Since 2015, Last Updated on: 22nd August 2021, 01:20 am. He's yellow as mustard but without the bite. Count your life by smiles, not tears. Got a big hole in the fence. -George Strait, You can take the girl out of Texas but not Texas out of the girl. Voltaire It takes a long time to become young. I love the fact that Texas is so big, but you dont feel small because of that. 65th Birthday Birthday Wishes Birthday Friends Husband Birthday Birthday Wishes Happy Birthday Sister Funny 60th Birthday 50th Birthday 50 Year Old Birthday Love Belated Birthday Thank You On this day, an amazing person came into the world. 7. We asked twelve renowned artists to illustrate their favorite Texas sayings, and we present as well a sample of other axioms and adages common to the statea collection of sayings as big as all hell and half of Texas. Put candles in a pie, and somebody's drunk in the kitchen.". Dont mess with Texas. Texas Department of Transportation slogan for a campaign to reduce littering on Texas roadways. From the deserts of West Texas to the beautiful Gulf Coast beaches, there is immense beauty in Texas that continues to provide inspiration to visitors and tourists. Happy birthday! No hill for a stepper.Slick as a whistle.Easy as pie. Famous Birthday Quote William Butler Yeats: "From our birthday, until we die, / Is but the winking of an eye." Plato: "Old age: A great sense of calm and freedom. Happy Birthday to the most lovable and adorable star on this planet. Above all, Texas is a nation in every sense of the word. He stays in the shadow of his mamas apron.If he was melted down, he couldnt be poured into a fight.Hes first cousin to Moses Rose.He wouldnt bite a biscuit.Hes yellow as mustard but without the bite.He may not be a chicken, but he has his henhouse ways. -Lindsay McElwee, Texaswas evidently the only place in the known universe, including Louisiana, that actually got hotter after the sun went down. He could talk the legs off a chair. 150 Best Happy Birthday Quotes and Wishes - Parade nashville caption ideas - best nashville captions for couples. 125 Incredible Happy Birthday Inspirational Quotes, Messages and Wishes I feel lower than a gopher hole.I feel so low I couldnt jump off a dime.She eats sorrow by the spoonful.You look like you were sent for and couldnt go.Sad enough to bring a tear to a glass eye.He looks like the cheese fell off his cracker. This digitized version has since been updated to remove offensive lines. He wasnt born, just squeezed out of a bartenders rag.Drunker than who shot John.Snot-slinging drunk.Drunk as Cooter Brown.Drunk as a skunk.Dont chop any wood tonight; Daddys coming home with a load.Tighter than bark on a log.Ive got the whistlebelly thumps and skull cramps. I wish everyone the world over had the dominating spirit that motivates Texans." - Billy Clayton Quotes About Texans To the best woman in the . One day, behind a general store in Central Texas, a firearms instructor in a wide-brimmed cowboy hat reached for the butt of his holster as I approached him for an interview. Shy as a mail-order bride.Shy as a crocus.Shy as sapphires. This is an all-out tantrum with hollerin', feet stompin' the works. Texas Stock Photos . 2. Back then the Panhandle had a panhandle. - The US death toll from . Today is the most important day of my life. If you get sick, injured, or have your stuff stolen, youll be happy to have the ability to pay for your medical bills or replace whats stolen or broken. -Carl Sandburg, Texas is like a beckoning star to American settlers. I can't believe it's already been a year since the last time I didn't buy you anything for your birthday. Showing search results for "Texas Birthday" sorted by relevance. READ MORE. "Texas is the finest portion of the globe that has blessed my vision.". Alexander McCall Smith, Texas has yet to learn submission to any oppression, come from what source it may. Backup Charging Bankfor your cell phone since youll be using it as a camera, GPS system, and general travel genie. Explore our collection of motivational and famous quotes by authors you know and love. Birthday Quotes PNG Transparent Images Free Download | Vector Files Best Texan Quotes. Happy Birthday For Him Happy Birthday Greetings Birthday Greeting Cards Birthday Gifts Birthday Messages Birthday Images Happy Birthday Harley Davidson Texas Independence Day Bday Quotes Hey, we're thrilled that you're here! Texas Independence Day in the United States It can be kind of a pain to find the major guidebooks once you land, or youll find them overpriced. Editors note: This article was first published in print in 1994. Beyonce's tracks like 'Baby Boy' and 'Crazy in Love' secured top positions in the 'Billboard Top 100' countdown charts. Just a small serving. Famous Birthday Quotes From the Famous Go shawty! Happy birthday to someone who's wonderful in every way. I feel sorry for you. I wish everyone the world over had the dominating spirit that motivates Texans. Billy Clayton. you got a problem. "Being from Texas, I would say I favor a pair of jeans you can wear some boots with." -Jensen Ackles "In Texas, we practically come out of the womb in jeans." -Kelly Clarkson "Texans ain't Texans if they aren't willing to boast about the state they call home." ~Anon "Texans ignored 'better,' long ago forgot the useless word 'good.'
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